Own Voice

I remember sniggering pityingly about the Beatles drivelling on about "finding themselves"
It sounded so self absorbed and what my Mom would have called "precious"
That was way back in the 60's I think
Some of you may remember that they found a TM (Trancendental Medidtation) guru and took off to the Far East in their efforts to "find themselves"

As an equally self centred teen at the time, I obviously didn't have clue what they were on about.
At that age you don't know that you need finding
Life, after all, centres entirely around you

Now I understand more what they may have been seeking
I am not lost spiritually - I have found what (or Who) I was seeking
But I am seeking something else:
My own "voice," perhaps expresses it best.

There is a sense of something inside me that hasnt seen the light of day
Something creative
Something free
Something more fun than I usually am
Something of the child that got lost in grown-upness

I am on a quest to let that out
To let my own voice be what it is
(Never mind if its not what I, or others, wanted it to be.)
To accept and appreciate my paintings, writings, sculptures - whatever - even if they don't fit in my "box" of my expectations.
To recognise that finding your own voice means accepting a voice that is, by defintion, not the same as everyone's else's.

And that is not only ok
But is the very thing being sought.